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The Amber Guyger story was a farce from the time it broke in the news until Amber Guyger was sentenced earlier this month.  There was so much about this saga that didn’t make sense and like Judge Judy says, “If it doesn’t make sense it isn’t true”.  Anyone that is in touch with reality and has any media savvy at all should know that Amber Guyger’s tale is pure fiction and we will never know the truth.  It’s a complete scam.

Amber walked into the apartment of Botham Jean and shot and killed him while he was relaxing.  Her excuse is that she was exhausted after a long day of work and she walked into the wrong apartment that just so happened to have the door cracked.  First of all, I have worked  many long days in my life.  I’ve always been able to make my way home.  And what are the chances that Amber went to the wrong apartment and she went into the one with the door cracked.  I’m just not buying it.

Personally I wouldn’t walk into my home if the door was cracked.  Surely a trained police officer should be able to handle such a situation.  Why didn’t she call one of her buddies to come help her?  I think that a cracked door would at least make me more aware of my surroundings.  Turning on a light and yelling out may have helped.

Poor Amber worked her fingers to the bone until she was too incoherent to find her apartment and question why the door was open but she was able to shoot straight in the dark in order to kill a man with one shot.  This girl has some skills.  Her prison nick name should be Annie Oakley.

It took a few days for Amber to get arrested.  I think that those days in between killing a man and being arrested were the days in which she and her law enforcement buddies came up with this excuse.  Then she was encouraged to carry herself in a demure manner even though we know she’s cocky, grow her hair longer and wear conservative but form fitting clothing.  I’ll give the woman credit for having a nice figure.  It came in handy.

Let’s skip to the jury.  In past high profile trials jurors remain out of the public eye for a long time and sometimes they never make a public statement.  In this case two of the jurors made appearances shortly after the sentence was announced on TV and explained their decision to sentence Amber to only ten years.

A Black woman and a White man had the nerve to say that Botham Jean was a good forgiving man and wouldn’t be vengeful.  It makes more sense to give a lengthy sentence to a murderer that killed a sweet person.  But this isn’t about making sense or justice this is about affirming Whiteness and it’s supposed moral superiority.

We will never know if Botham Jean would have wanted Amber to be forgiven.  I find it difficult to believe that anyone would have a grain of sympathy for someone that would treat them with such carelessness and recklessness.  Amber claims to have defended herself with no regard for others.  Even if you believe Amber’s story that this was an honest mistake she still isn’t the person that deserves sympathy and tears.

The family of Botham Jean played into a trope, perhaps unintentionally but I think they were threatened or bought off, which is becoming quite common in the media.  The trope of the benevolent spiritual Negro that loves others (Whites) more than he or she loves themselves.  It’s becoming nauseating.

I don’t understand the purpose of all these stories about a Black waitress cutting up the food of an elderly White customer, a Black boy shielding an elderly White woman that he doesn’t know with his jacket in the rain, a Black woman that allows her wedding photo shoot to be interrupted by a little White girl that thinks she is a Disney princess in her wedding dress or a Black cheerleader that jumps off her homecoming float during a parade to save a White toddler from something that his parents should have handled.  I guess they are supposed to be feel good stories.  But I don’t feel validated by this as a Black woman and I think White people are positioned as the superior party.

These stories are not newsworthy and the service and heroism is always a one way street.  The person that is always laboring, sacrificing their comfort or their moment of glory is always a Black person.  Yes, there are equally nauseating stories about White people helping poor, unfortunate, shiftless Blacks that are down on their luck.  But those often end up being Go Fund me scams designed by the White savior.

The real contrast to the benevolent Negro stories are the numerous stories of reckless behavior that endangers Black lives.  This recklessness is consistently defended or overlooked by the American public.  Because White people and their sense of safety and comfort is paramount to all else in America.  Black people are supposed to buy into this too at their own expense.

Botham Jean’s family unfairly lost a loved one in the prime of his life and they chose to defend and sympathize with his killer and not their son or brother.  I believe in forgiveness but forgiveness is not for a person that has wrongs others.  Wrongdoers are owed nothing and there is no need for reconciliation.

I think it’s suspicious that the hug between Amber and Botham’s younger brother is the image that was presented to the public by numerous media outlets along with a message of forgiveness.  I didn’t watch the trial but I don’t recall Amber admitting that her actions were inappropriate or asking for forgiveness.  I only read about her making excuses for killing an innocent man and then trying to gain sympathy from the public and mercy from the jury.

Amber is a moderately attractive White woman and the world is use to presenting people like her as virtuous.  The Jeans, particularly the men seem to agree with her.  The dad even said he want to be her friend.  Of all the emotions and thoughts this family must have towards Botham’s tragic end I don’t understand why their thoughts about Amber are what made headlines.

We didn’t hear much about their grieving process or their relationship to their family member.  Their statements were centered around Amber.Every time I’ve had to exercise forgiveness it was a private matter.  The person that I felt that betrayed me wasn’t even a part of the process.  My heart, spirit and quality of life were at the center of forgiving someone that mistreated me.  They had nothing to do with what goes on in my heart and I have no desire to interact with them again.  In my experience that how forgiveness goes.  There usually isn’t a face to face reconciliation and hug.  That only happens on sit coms, rom coms and TV talk shows.

Brandt Jean begged to hug Amber and said he didn’t think she deserved to go to jail.  He laid it on pretty thick before the audience.  The judge who I believe was coerced or simply incompetent granted permission for him to hug her.  They ran and hugged like two lovers being reunited.  I think this was all planned and choreographed.  We’ve all seen videos of grief stricken families attacking their loved ones killer in court.

Botham Jean’s brother could have taken that opportunity to strangle Amber and the rest of the family could have cleared the bench and jumped her.  I’m surprised the judge didn’t think of that.  If I was a judge that wanted to maintain an orderly court room as opposed to a circus there wouldn’t be any hugging at all.  But I think Tammy Kemp is a phony and a puppet.  I don’t think she has any real control over her court room and I hope voters get rid of her at their first opportunity.

I don’t think a judge with integrity would hug a convicted killer and give her a gift in front of the victim’s family.  I also think it’s a bit too perfect that the judge and the bailiff that comforted Ms. Guyer were both Black women.  How many Black women do you think work in the Dallas justice system?  I’m sure it’s a minority.

And my goodness Tammy looked homely!  The woman wore gold bedazzled flip flops before when she knew she was being watched by the entire nation.  But she was sure to get herself styled to go on TV and cry and make excuses for her tomfoolery.

Now let’s talk about the key witness to the case and Botham Jean’s neighbor that overheard the turmoil that fateful night Joshua Brown.  He’s dead now.  He was killed in a drive by shooting.  Those usually take months to solve and sometimes they are never resolved.  But the Dallas PD was able to make an arrest in this case remarkable fast.

Joshua Brown was supposedly killed in a drug deal gone bad.  I thought he was in the Airbnb business.  Did Mr. Brown have a criminal history?  Usually the media uncovers those types of things right away.  Amber’s defense could have used that to discredit him but I don’t think that happened.

The drug dealers that allegedly shot Joshua were from Louisiana and traveled to Dallas for this business meeting.  Louisiana ran out of weed I suppose.  And I guess we’re expected to believe that Mr. Brown set up a drug deal in the parking lot of his own apartment building.  I’m not in the drug dealing business but I don’t think that’s how it’s done.

The entire Amber Guyger story is a farce and a scam.  We will never know the truth.  The way all of this played out in the media is absolutely, literally unbelievable.  It was all a show from the Dallas PD PR machine to try and satisfy Black people with the bare minimum while centering itself around White feelings.

 

 

 

Recently Jeana Turner of ANTM Cycle 24 made a video discussing her experience as a contestant on America’s Next Top Model.  Her complaints are similar to complaints of reality TV show contestants since Real World I.  Jeana says she was edited in a way that portrayed unfairly.  She also said that producers created an environment that would create dramatic situations.  And like many other ANTM contestants Jeana says the show hurt her career more than it helped.

I watched Jeana’s season and she was portrayed as a villain.  She wasn’t my favorite that season but I didn’t dislike her.  I just thought that she was competitive, driven and not particularly warm and friendly towards the other girls.  I don’t think she owed them that.  I respected Jeana during her season.

I’m not particularly sympathetic to Jeana about the way she was portrayed because many reality TV contestants have talked about their experiences once their show is over.  It wouldn’t be difficult to research what it is like to be on a reality TV show.  Contestants are not held hostage in their living quarters.  They have the choice to leave if they find the circumstances to be unbearable.

The intriguing thing about this video isn’t Jeana’s complaints against the producers of ANTM.  The most compelling statement in this video comes just before the thirty minute mark.  Jeana posed for Playboy when she was eighteen and she says that she felt judged by Tyra for posing nude.  She says of Tyra “You say sex sells but how did that work out for my career?”.  Young women have been given a bad bill of sale.  Women are being groomed from a young age to be used sexually while getting nothing in return.

I do agree with Jeana that Tyra is a hypocrite.  I’ve watched her for years and her producers have cast women that have no romantic or sexual history with men and then asks them to pose nude with male models on ANTM.  When the model feels uncomfortable or awkward with the male model they are admonished by the judges panel and told they need to sacrifice to give the photographer a good shot.

On her old talk show she had girls on that were sexually active at young ages and she admonished them for that behavior.  So where does Tyra really stand?  Does she want to encourage casual sex or protect innocence and purity?  I think she just wants to sell a TV show.  So I’m with Jeana on that point.

Jeana said that she listened to Tyra’s mantra of sex sells.  She was having a difficult time establishing a modeling career so when she got an opportunity to be in Playboy she took it.  She later regretted it when her idol that gained fame from modeling underwear and bikinis looked down on her for posing nude.

Other than Anna Nicole Smith I’m not sure that posing for Playboy has lead to anyone’s success in high fashion.  But Anna Nicole Smith was one of a kind.  Jeana was groomed by feminist teachings that taught her that putting her body on display is empowering for women.  Jeana listened to Tyra who became a powerful woman in fashion and television by showing skin.

 

 

Jeana must not have been completely comfortable with baring it all because she regrets it now.  I’ve never heard Pamela Anderson Lee express regret for posing for Playboy and she’s made several appearances in the magazine.  But Pamela became a successful actress by making herself a sex symbol.  It was a part of her brand and it suited her personality.  I don’t think a compromise was made.

But Pamela Anderson Lee was an exception.  She was comfortable with posing nude and was around twenty three the first time she posed for Playboy.  Jeana was only eighteen.  I think the entertainment industry will make an example of women like Pamela Anderson Lee and Anna Nicole Smith as paradigms of what can happen if you push your boundaries and take a chance.  There’s that, and Pamela and Anna Nicole were never really taken seriously.  They didn’t even take take themselves seriously.

Here is another example of how new aged morality and feminist thinking is not telling women and girls the entire truth about putting your body on display and modesty.  There is a cost that goes along with it and most women are not prepared to pay that price.

Jeana was lied to by a culture that celebrates women selling themselves cheaply for the short term pleasure of men in exchange for validation or favors.  Women need to understand that they can choose to pose nude if they want but make sure it’s a strategic move that is a part of your brand that will help you meet your goals.  If you want to be taken seriously it’s probably better to remain fully clothed.

Women need to stop selling ourselves short.  Jeana has a very unique look and is photogenic. She is driven and passionate about her career.  She didn’t need Playboy for recognition in high fashion or acting.  She already had what she needs for success.  Posing nude did more for Playboy readers than it did for her.  I think that’s the idea behind the deceptive teachings of feminism and new aged morality .

 

Over the weekend I read the advice column Ask E. in “Elle” magazine.  A young woman said that she was gradually ghosted by a man that she dated for around a month.  He told her that she was not marriage material.  The man is long gone but she still feels bad about what he told her.  Her letter to “Elle” reminded me of a video that I saw on Facebook years ago.

Creflo Dollar is right.  When you meet someone new be sure to ask 1,000 questions at the beginning of the relationship.  And be prepared to answer questions.  If your suitor isn’t asking much about your motivations or background they probably have shallow reasons for wanting to date you.

Ask the right questions.  I think that it is important to find out a person’s motivations for dating.  Women make the mistake of thinking that men are motivated by the same things as them.  Women are motivated to find long term relationships.  Men are motivated to find short term no strings attached sex.

Men are great at wasting time and they have no problem starting a relationship with a woman and faking a courtship in order to get sex until he finds a woman that he really wants for a commitment.  It’s one of the biggest scams of the modern age.  The fake relationship may last a night, month or a decade.  Fake relationships have started entire families.  It all seems like a waste of time and energy to me but it’s the way that many men operate.

The woman that wrote to Ask E. didn’t say whether she became intimate with the man.  A woman can be ghosted if she refuses to have sex right away or if she has sex and he decides he’s ready to move along.  If the man thought she was “wife material” it wouldn’t have mattered.  He would have remained in her life without judgement.  Men marry promiscuous women all the time.  If he likes her he likes her and that’s all she wrote.

So like Creflo Dollar said don’t be afraid to ask 1,000 questions.  Don’t start a relationship with a bunch of small talk, banter and meaningless compliments.  You already know you’re pretty.  A man shouldn’t have a problem stating his true intentions even if he only wants casual sex.  Perhaps the young lady is interested in that too.  That sounds like an equally yoked couple to me.

If a man is looking for a long term commitment he shouldn’t be afraid to state his objective.  He should also be able to say why he is attracted to you and why he thinks you might be a good life partner.  Ask the specifics at the beginning.  Now I know people lie and there is nothing you can do about that.  Just make sure the actions match the words over an extended period of time.

If you open the dialogue it should at least be interesting to see what he has to say.  You know how you get asked weird, vague questions in job interviews.  I heard a hiring manager say once that they just want to see how you will respond.  The answer itself isn’t as important.  The idea is to get the candidate to talk so you can see what is on their mind.

If you are ghosted immediately that’s probably what he would have done at some point anyway.  Trash takes itself out.  Get the truth out on the table and find out where the man’s head is before you invest your heart and time.

People are savage out here and there is no honor.  People act out of selfishness and don’t really care if they hurt someone.  They just think that the person that they took advantage of shouldn’t have been such a sucker.  Unfortunately dating is almost like Spy Vs. Spy and the most cunning and suspicious person wins.  I’m not exactly sure what the prize is.  Waiting to get stabbed in the back doesn’t seem like a start to a great romance to me.

Ask 1,000 questions towards the beginning of a relationship.  It might be a good idea to ask the first one or two hundred before the first date.  And ask questions that are specific to you to see if he sees you as merely a place holder until he runs across someone he deems as wife material.  Heck, ask him what he considers wife material and if you fit into his mold.  I think that you have more to gain than you have to lose.

And please don’t go over his house unless you simply want to get laid.  That’s a real crap shoot and a lot can go wrong for women if you do that.  After sex women esteem men more and I think that men esteem women less.  If you care what he thinks you’re better off to keep the relationship in public spaces for a while.  The truth will come out eventually.

I enjoy beauty pageants.  I have been watching them for as long as I remember.  They are the stuff that dreams are made of.  Who wouldn’t like to be named the prettiest woman in the state or country and given a crown and roses?  If everyone was honest we would all admit that we would all enjoy that validation.

I value pageants because they are a conspicuous display of hyper femininity.  I’m all for it and I hope they never change.  I don’t think that women get very many opportunities to be in the spotlight and pageants give them a platform.  Miss America and Miss USA are the two biggest pageants that come to my mind and they are distinct brands.  Miss USA contestants are the girls that boys liked in school and Miss America contestants are the pretty girls that teachers liked in school.  Both are great.

Recently a representative for the Miss America pageant remarked that “Educated women don’t parade around in swimsuits”.  That quote is actually part of a sentence and the remark was taken out of context but nonetheless I will share my thoughts on the controversy not the comment itself.

I found this remark to be a bit hypocritical since the Miss America pageant only recently took the swimsuit competition out of their pageant.  But my real concern is the contestants of the Miss USA pageant that got all up in their feelings because they are personally offended by Miss America’s quote.  Miss USA which feeds into the Miss Universe competition still have swimsuit competitions.

I follow pageant fan pages and several beauty queens on IG.  A lot of the Miss USA title holders have posted messages of themselves in bikinis and listed their academic accomplishments.  They posted long IG rants about how the Miss America Organization’s notion about educated women in bikinis is dated, sexist and hostile towards women.  The Miss America organization is absolutely right.

I agree that a woman can be smart and sexy.  A woman can be flirtatious and competent.  It’s unfortunate that the world sees women in a one dimensional way but feminism has not changed that.  Feminism is making things worse because much of their focus in on looks and sexuality.

Here’s the hypocrisy of Miss USA and Miss Universe contestants.  Most of these women are absolutely brilliant.  Many of them have impressive careers, educational backgrounds and compelling backstories.  But most of the ones that I’ve heard about after their reign has ended go into entertainment or they marry a wealthy man.  I think that marrying well is the real end game for women in the Miss USA/Miss Universe pageant system.

There is nothing wrong with any of that but they got their new opportunities because they look good in a bikini not because they studied hard in school.  Miss USA contestants are smart enough to know this and they are bluffing the world with politically correct feminist rhetoric that sets other women up for failure.  I think that this is the case for feminism in general.  Sorry but women in most day to day situations can not present themselves as sex objects and be taken seriously as intellectuals.  For some reason the bikini cancels out the intellect.

Feminism tries to have it both ways.  They want to tell women that they can be taken seriously as a woman in a bikini.  That simply isn’t true unless you are a swim suit model or perhaps an Olympic swimmer.  If you disagree imagine wearing a bathing suit to a job interview.  Even if you are applying to be a lifeguard that wouldn’t go over well.

I think women should use all of the tools at their disposal to open as many doors as possible including sex appeal.  But women need to be realistic about the way women are pigeonholed.  Feminism isn’t changing the way women are perceived when they put forth sexualized images of themselves.  I think that women need to present themselves the way they want to be perceived. Consider your goal and dress the part.

If anything feminists are encouraging women to use their bodies to gain love, acceptance and opportunities instead of using their minds.  That’s why the body positivity movement is popular.  Women that don’t fit the mold of a beauty queen want to be able to feel validated for how they look too.  That’s what today’s feminism is all about.

If you want to be taken seriously as a professional dress the part for the profession you choose.  But when it’s time to party or have a day at the beach have fun with fashion and enjoy yourself.  You can’t always take yourself seriously.  There’s a time and a place for everything.

I just wish the beauty queens that protested the remark from the Miss America Organization were a little more honest and thoughtful in their responses.  They could have said I was competing to be Miss USA, not a receptionist at an accountant’s office.  There are scholarships, fame, travel, jewelry and meeting with wealthy men at stake.  I will broker world peace in a suit that grazes my knees later.

I honestly don’t know why they responded at all.  The remark from the Miss America Organization seemed pretty innocuous to me and it fits their girl next door brand.  Miss America is a non profit organization that is focused on community service.  Miss USA is more glitz and showbiz.  Fighting for your right to be seen as a professional in a bikini is not a hill I would want to die on.  That’s why I have a hard time taking feminism seriously.

 

 

Feminists like to make conversations like this a matter of sexual assault and rape.  I want to make it clear that I don’t think that sexual assault and rape has anything to do with clothing or lack thereof.  People that jump from a statement of dressing for respect to sexual violation are trying to silence opposing thoughts with emotional blackmail.